Wednesday, February 18, 2009
HELP!!!!
Does anyone have any good advice for handling a two and a half year old with a new baby? Even just moral support would be nice! Josh has suddenly turned into a whole new person (very demanding, bossy, and yells at me and hits me all the time). I am pretty sure it is normal for his age and having to share me with a new baby. Josh's nursery teachers say that he is one of the best kids, so either he acts completely different for me or they are just being nice. On the flip side of things, luckily, Nate is an angel baby (I feel very lucky and blessed) or else I'd be in the nut house ;) jk. I really feel bad for him since I don't spend hardly any time with him, except to feed him. I'd love to hear any thoughts or suggestions. Thanks!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
6 comments:
Making sure I spend one on one time with each kid helps me. Well, I guess Nate's one on one time is pretty much all the time right now. I guess if you're not feeling too tired, when Nate naps, make sure you play with Even. Plus the whole being mean for Mommy. VERY normal. I was Wills nursery leader last year, and he would be THE ONLY child not listening to me and running around during the lesson. Now that he's in sunbeams, his teacher says he's great. Whew. Aren't we so lucky that we get to see their mean side? I'm sorry you're having to deal with this. No fun.
I am sorry you're having a tough time with Josh. When Sawyer was born we got a few new toys for Ava that she could only play with while I had to feed the baby. When I had to hold him and feed him is when she acted out the most. So, these fun and special new toys where the ones she got to enjoy while I was busy with the baby. Does Josh like to paint? Have you tried the Water-WOW paints? You paint the book with water - no mess. Then when it dries the child can paint it all over again. Ava and Sawyer loves these. Does Josh like the computer? If you go to PBS.org there are loads of games for babies and toddlers to play. They even have games where the child can hit any key on the keyboard and it will go through the letters of the alphabet. Hey, it keeps your child busy and they get to learn at the same time. How about giving him a little container of water, on the kitchen floor and letting him "wash" his toys. Does he like stickers? What about a cheap and fun sticker-book that he can play with while you feed the baby? - My kids still act out like crazy when they don't get 110% of my attention. Its hard. When I have to cook dinner they usuall fight or destroy the house. Josh might just be acting out because a lot has changed for him and now Mommy and Daddy are busy with baby brother. It will get better. I find that if I can keep my kids entertained then they are happier. Why do you think we're ALWAYS out and on the go? My kids drive me bonkers when we're stuck in the house. Ha Ha! I am here for you if you need someone to talk to.
Hey long time no see. Well when I had my 2nd child my first was 2years old. She did the same stuff as Josh. She started refusing to take naps etc. I don't have much advice except to try to have your own "me" time when Josh goes to bed. I glad we found each other you are just as beautiful as ever, good luck.
Being a new mom of two is hard at first. My oldest was 2 1/2 when our younger daughter was born. When I would ask my Dh to give me the baby Kinzley would jump in my lap and not want to share me.
The biggest things we told our oldest was how special our family was to get two girls. That God gave them both to us and how important the job of the big sister was. I'd go on and on about how much help she was to me and how I don't think I could do this without her. We'd compare their noses or finger and saw how Kinzley was bigger and she had such an important job in being big sis. Plus try and explain babies take sooo much time and mom is tired. It won't always be this way.
I live in Iowa too and I know we are tired of this cold weather. Tell him how exciting it will be to take his baby brother to the park and stuff when it gets warmer. I'm sure he is feeling cabin fever too! If it makes you feel any better our girls are 3 and 5 1/2 and they STILL fight over me...Once it's nice out and they have other things to do the fighting gets less..
Hang in there!!!
I think like you said it is very normal for kids this age to act out to get attention...the "honeymoon" phase of having a new baby is over and they start to realize this new sibling cuts into their time with mom and dad. Grace definitely has had acting out periods. Some lasting just one afternoon, others for a week or more. I think I told you about when she said, "I'm going to do something naughty." That was on a day when Anne was extra fussy and taking up more of our attention. I think 2 things helped us through those times: 1. Kevin and I tried to up the positive attention as much as possible and 2. We were consistent with our expectations and limits...no hitting mommy no matter what. And if that meant I have to stop nursing to put her in timeout, then I did. (I only had to do that once, I think hearing Anne cry was worse for Grace then the time out). I really felt like she was testing my limits to see if they were the same even with the new sister around.
Another thing that I feel is soooo important is to follow the counsel in Elder Bednar's last conference address Pray Always (I know you like his talks...). Two things stood out to me. First, I really think it's important to pray over ALL things, including when you're in the moment of the countless daily parenting decisions: "Do I put Josh in timeout right now, or do I just give him a big hug?" And second, later in the talk he mentions praying for individual family members BY NAME in front of them. I think Grace notices when I pray about her, especially when I am VERY specific about little things she's struggling with. It's a powerful tool and it can help you feel more love for them at that moment too.
Good luck!
Hey, we are in the same boat, sort of...any way, you should call me sometime and we can chat. 208 522 7837. In our case Emma is the neglected one because Jane is so sick I have to hold her 24/7 (only slightly exaggerated). Call.
Post a Comment